Getting Serious

At the crack of dawn (8.15am), I headed off with one of my fellow Readers to Worcester, for a day focusing on funeral ministry. We were attending a course entitled 'Taking Funerals Seriously', which was run by the C of E, in a Baptist church - because it is a very good place for such meetings...

At the end of our Reader Training,  all eight of our group signed up to do the Funeral training. I had not originally intended to get involved with funeral ministry, but figured it would be easier to do the training while I had a lift available, and then see what happened. To be honest I wasn't sure if I wanted to be involved in this complicated part of life.
What did I have to offer those going through one of the most painful times of their lives?
Would they want to talk about the manner of their loved one's demise? I pondered, with a pinch of panic and portion of paranoia.

Being a mainly 'new town' parish, we do not get many funerals. Many of the local population are 3rd or 4th generation unchurched, and when faced with bereavement the local church is just not on their radar.

It was some time after the training concluded before I got the opportunity to take part in a funeral service. To my surprise, I discovered that I was quite good at drawing together a service, and leading a family through the difficult task of saying goodbye to a loved one.

Over the last few years, the funeral industry has got more complicated.
Funeral Directors want to finalise arrangements within a very small time period and often have their favourite people, who they trust to fill the slots.
At the same time demands on clergy have increased, so the messages do not always get through to them at a time when they can respond quickly.
Funeral Directors are increasingly selling 'plans', to help secure their portion of the market, and to reassure those who want to reduce the burden, that making funeral arrangements and paying for them, places on their loved ones.
Meanwhile, Readers, who may have more time to lead funerals, do so at the discretion of the clery.
It is all very complicated!

The church is losing its market share of the funerals, as it is often perceived as outdated, inflexible and too formal.  However, funeral services led by a Civil Celebrant offer no hope, just the message that the person they have lost is now a twinkling star, leaving those left behind devastated. Sometimes retired clergy fill in by taking funerals. This is fine if they are linked to a parish and ongoing bereavement support is offered, otherwise, that deprives the family of the continued support that the church should be offering.

The church needs to reclaim some of the ground it has lost, and reclaim its place helping the nation to say farewell, well. Let us hope that this training will inspire us to 'Take Funerals Seriously, before it is too late!