Usually, I avoid food shopping, preferring to allow my husband to wander freely around the hallowed corridors of edible consumables unfettered by a reluctant shopper.
I especially dislike food shopping on a Sunday and, in this context, two negatives a positive doth not make!
Over the years DH and I have discovered that in the interests of matrimonial harmony it is better if we do not go shopping together. My husband shops strictly by list, whilst I am rather more impulsive.
Due to his dietary intolerances, he minutely scans the ingredients of EVERY package, just to check that nothing nasty has snuck into a product while he wasn't looking. I get bored and wander off, usually sneaking off with the trolley, weaving my way down the aisles in search of interesting contraband to add a bit of variety to our haul. We discovered during the lockdown days of online shopping, that around 90% of items purchased are repeats from the previous delivery, so I like to take the opportunity to remedy this, to my husband's disproval.
By the time my husband is satisfied that his purchases are 'safe', I am usually nowhere to be seen. The poor man ends up searching the store for the trolley and his errant wife, armed with the products that have passed the tolerance test.
One advantage of splitting up is that he misses the opportunity to vet the contents of the trolley.
If he observes me chuck anything in the trolley, he is programmed to respond
I prefer to let him have a surprise once the items have been scanned...
"We don't need that!"
"Cheese selection?
Coffee cake?
Courgettes?
A parsley plant? - but these were not on the list..."
"The KHT enjoys her cheese but had disappeared into the toiletries aisle, so I figured a selection was a good choice."
As expected the bill was double his normal 'list' shop, which didn't go down too well.
"Well if you don't need to shop for twice as long that will balance things out..." I pointed out.
The KHT gave the bulging shopping bags a surprised look
"Golly that is a lot of shopping!"
She is used to accompanying my husband on his more restrained excursions.
Fortunately, we didn't have to carry the shopping home.
Later that afternoon DH goes to put the meat in the oven for dinner and is quite impressed by the relatively low cost of the joint of lamb from the promotions display.
"That is a good price!"
"Well, it came out of the promotion fridge."
"Oh, I never look in there, as it is usually beef..."
I didn't ask how he knew it was beef if he never looked in there...
Supermarket promotion planners, you can position your special offers in the middle of an aisle, but a man with a list will never notice.
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